#im literally dying inside
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guys help 😭 I just unlocked the most embarrassing memory!
so I was just minding my own business, thinking about fics for my OCs, perfectly normal stuff, okay? Then I think ‘maybe I should draw my OCs’. Boom. Just like that memory is unlocked. Do you want to know what that memory was about? Do you fucking want to know what that memory was about?! (Insert deep dramatic breath here) it was a memory about a series of mini comics I made. It was all stick figures, and it had two male lead characters. One was allergic to everything and was constantly being thrown into his allergens, the other one was the ‘quite kid’ who would always take care of the sneezing other character, giving him allergy meds, stepping outside with him, stuff like that.
I WAS A GODAMN 8 YEAR OLD WHEN I DREW THAT!!!
I didn’t even know what a kink was back then.
and even worse
I SHOWED THOSE COMICS TO MY MOTHER!! TO. MY. MOTHER.!!! 😭😭😭
and then I kept getting more memories of dumb sneeze stuff I did before learning what a kink is. I remembered doing degradation meets sneeze RPs with my stuffed animals. One was sneezy and allergic while the other bullied him for it until he got concerned and started taking care of him. I remember once specifically asking my mom to put on a specific episode of a show, saying “no, not that episode. I want the one where he sneezes”
like dear lord. I hope my mom doesn’t remember any of that.
#snz kink#sneeze kink#snz fic#snzblr#sneeze blog#sneezefucker#snz fet#snz things#blank strikes again#No snz#im literally dying inside
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THE alpha sister wife
#hey so twitter is quite literally dying so im trying to use tumblr more#gigi thompson#inside job#sketch#wip
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Do you rant to your girlfriend about how a giant pet peeve of yours with Gideon the Ninth fanart is when they portray Gideon with a longsword (or worse yet a fucking arming sword) instead of the greatsword she clearly is trained for? Or are you normal?
#ill accept rapier fanart cuz yknow. plot#tamsym literally acknowledges a friend trained in zweihander technique in the book y'all#gideon uses a fucking zwei and i will die on this hill#i saw art of her wield a shortsword in two hands and started going feral#it was really pretty art otherwise but my sword lesbian heart was dying inside#“stop blocking with the blade” hema technique for longsword is more parry focused while greatsword technique is more blocking focused#im normal and fine its fine#bite me#the locked tomb#gideon the ninth#gideon nav#tlt#harrow the ninth
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i hear her siren's call...
but i must stay strong...
#remember what they did to wyll.........#i promised myself i wouldnt touch the game till the patched in more wyll content#*puts on clown shoes and makeup*#but by god having now watched all the dav companions romance/friendship scenes all day and night i only think about her....🐸👄#i haven't seen her since february im literally dying on the inside#personal#delete later
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Talking about an au
This is one that has been on my mind since 419 and tbh I thought for sure it could happen
Remember when Tomura shed his skin during the Floating UA battle? Well I wondered if a similar thing would happen again in Mount Fuji
Picture it. In the void, AFO eats Tomura. He's dying as he's told everything about AFO's involvement in his life. AFO takes over his body, hand formed over mouth and all. It looks pretty bad. All the stuff happens with Izuku getting his arms back, the heroes coming to his aid etc. Izuku punches AFO (end of 422, beginning of 423). Here's where it diverges from canon:
Izuku punches AFO and he starts crumbling slowly, from his gut (where the impact was) to the rest of him. Except before it even reaches his chest, his face starts to crack open. Visually we can see this crack isn't the same as the crumbling of his body. It's one we've seen before, across his face in the middle of a battle. A parallel back to this
Except within the crack is Tomura's face. Tomura inside Tomura's body. Tomuraception
What happened? Well, the power of Izuku's will to stop AFO (the punch) allowed the vestiges that got thrown into the body to reawaken and bring Tomura's soul back. At the same time, minutes before, Tomura, slowly dying in the void, began to think. About everything AFO told him, how he was doomed before he was even born. How much that angered him, the rage coursing through his soul. He already had a strong will before, but now he really can't accept what has happened and he can't accept AFO getting away with it. Even if AFO's fate is to die, he'd rather be the one on the other end of it, alive and watching him. Better yet, being the hand that ultimately brings about his end
As a visual representation, it's like Tomura reaches out, desperate to climb out of the abyss he is slowly dying in, and he is met with several hands reaching back, taking his hand and pulling him out and back to the world. The vestiges, who have been reawakened by Izuku
Before, Tomura has not been able to die or stay dead. So why should this not be the same? With the power of rage, spite, his hero and some ghostly relatives, he lives on. He twists his own fate by accepting the hands that reach out and climbing out of the hole AFO threw him in
AFO's Tomura face cracks open. Tomura forces AFO's vessel apart from the head, almost like a butterfly climbing out of its cocoon, almost like he is actively prying his own cage open and escaping for good
AFO had been crumbling and was ripped open, but in a desperate attempt to stay together and stay alive (also fueled by anger at being pushed to the edge like this + Tomura somehow coming back from the dead), he uses his quirks (mostly drills) to keep his body intact for now (this is already shown in 423)
Also, I guess it depends on what you would like to believe, but the way I see it, Tomura could come back either with just his decay OR with the vestiges choosing another vessel for what little power they can give left and so backing Tomura up with the last of OFA. Aka 10th user Tomura. It's not as powerful as it was with Izuku but it still adds a lot, just enough to pack a real punch. Personally I think if we're already throwing away "what is realistic" then I might as well go big or go home and go with 10th user Tomura my beloved
It's from this point that he and Izuku begin to work together to kill the old body. As you can imagine, it's probably not an immediate bonding of friendship or whatever, but it's more or less teamwork formed with the general statement of "we still have things to work out, hero, but I don't care about that right now. I hate him more than anyone else on this damn mountain and I can't stand the thought of letting anyone else kill him but me" etc but then progresses as they fight
#you may be thinking#'tomura literally jumping out of his own body? lol that makes no sense'#well it didn't make sense realistically when tomura turned INSIDE OUT and wore his OWN SKIN around his waist like a skirt either#so#its MY au and I get to choose the unrealistic ways my fav could come back!!#im not really thinking hard about this except for 'this would be cool if it became a parallel' and also 'tomura deserved to kill afo'#also i like the idea of the vestiges being all for tomura's destructive ways just this one time#izuku reaching a hand out to him: please tenko this doesn't have to be you 😔#the vestiges reaching a hand out to him: please tenko this can totally be you. kill him#the vestiges + tomura: i support all for one's rights. all for one's rights to shut the fuck up!!#i mean that basically happened in canon anyway#they said 'okay you're dying already but we'll bring you back to help kill afo. as a treat'#this way he doesn't have to die#there's probably more details to this but this is like the bare bones of it#bnha#bnha manga spoilers#shigaraki and midoriya#mettys posts#metty posts#bnha au#bnha spoilers
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When I think about it it's wild how many passion projects I wanna do the mere SECOND I'm done with my highschool years like I have only a few months left and the thought hit me like a BOULDER
I want to write the fanfictions I got ideas for. I want to finish the ones I haven't completed and was left in my drafts for months straight
I wanna make progress of that one Sans AU visual novel dating sim that I started over a year ago
I wanna have the time to draw everything and anything that I want without worrying if I should be doing my homework
I wanna learn how to animate so badlyyyyy
I wanna make those animation memes I've been thinking and jotting down in my sketchbook for wayy too long
And last but not least I want a cat. Maybe a bunny too... Like PLEASE I've been researching and thinking about them for years now and I'd squeal from joy
AUSHHS THERES SO MANY THINGS I WANNA DO BUT DON'T HAVE THE TIME TO AT THE MOMENT IT SUCKKSSSS
#mizu rambles#im dying inside#literally disappears from this blog for god known how long then drops a small silly rant HAJSB
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Me any other time: ohhh my gawd we will NEVER use half the math we learn it's literally just for brain strengthening and logic skill building urrrggghhh
Me doing papercrafts: OMG Pythagoras ( ꈍᴗꈍ) this theorem fucking slaps (๑♡⌓♡๑) just used it six times ♡(> ਊ <)♡ and sine and cosine my beloveds (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ ) just helped me make this curve (*˘︶˘*).。*♡ (◍•ᴗ•◍)✧*。peace and love on planet earth (✿^‿^)
#math#pythagoras#pythagorean theorem#papercraft#literally me#i cant count today#had to use a calculator to gind out that .5 is one half of one#im dying inside
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listen...listen... idk man i didn't expect downfall to hit me as hard as it did. but i'm at the end of ep101 and i have cried more maybe than during any other part of this story...and what a story within a story downfall is
it's about faith, the faith the mortals have in the gods and that the gods have in mortals, the faith in their creations, in and for their love of each other. and there is something so moving and intoxicating and emotional about that depiction, of gods deciding to become mortals to achieve an end goal, but of learning how much mortals love and feel and suffer
just the love between them all, everyone depicted. the wildmother and the lawbearer... the emissary.... trist and ayden, the everlight and the dawnfather... fucking just....everyone
idk man this sort of tragic story really just gets me so so so fucking bad, it hits me in such a unique way
#i am. so emo#cassida reaching out for the help of a god in a city that would kill her for prayer because her son is dying#betrayer gods and prime deities working together#asmodeus--ASMODEUS becoming who he is because he took the brunt of the force of their ship coming to exandria#the emissary being sent out ahead of the lawbearer because she could not bear to be unable to break her own rules if she had to save her wi#the way noshir's voice changed before the matron of ravens and he genuinely was a child#the way the lawbearer held the hand of her wife and asked the wildmother to tell her everything about her brave child#the way trist tried to hold onto her husband and children for as long as she fucking could. this mortal life she'd made#just...the matron of ravens being the matron of ravens. being kind.#the fact that the dawnfather was a fifteen year old boy#i am actively crying right now post episode#it's not a bells hells episode and i have missed them SO much but holy shit i think this six hour long insane episode has been my favorite#my favorite of the entire campaign#might even end up being of all of cr point blank eventually we'll see#not to mention the INSANE combat and roles#abubakar???? INSANE. what a fucking guy#silaha was a blast and the meteor swarm was unbelievable#the fact that nick knew the mechanics INSIDE AND OUT???#i'd literally watch it again just to pay attention to how he maneuvers the layers of abilities and stats#anyway im so weak right now#going to go through everything for those eps in the tags now#critical role#personal
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not a comment on a r/fatuiHQ meme of all things making me finally notice that childe activating FL all the way back in the golden house cutscene actually summons those black hole/collapsing star imagery things (looking Exactly like the narwhal boss drop at a specific frame too) behind him if u look at it closely at the right frame😭😭😭
(peak subreddit btw.)
i mean its not Completely new for a motif his teleporting in the 4.2 opera cutscene is a much more clear example of the same exact visual effect but. Dang i never slowed the 1.1 cutscene down enough to see it for myself there before
what a cool detail and reccurring motif there! now let me lose my mind and credibility for a bit Thanks
(actual nonsense warning lmao its just cool black hole sfx but gone downhill)
(a Completely unrelated compilation here Surely. yes the narwhals spout attack thingy is less Obviously the same visual but its a pretty picture of my beloved. sue me. also its close enough 2 me)
anyway isnt it Curious how all these effects are ummmm black holes. like there are stars visibly collapsing here uwu. and black holes are. Collapsed dead stars. wouldnt it be funny if the narwhal boss drop archive entry somehow directly implies that the eye of maelstrom (a black hole) could simply be the echo of its prey. Which are. Yaknow. sometimes stars. for a cosmic whale. so an echo of its prey is an echo of a dead star. crazy ik. if anything like that existed i mean
oh JEEPERS. next thing youll tell me stars are archons forbid often used as a sort of allegory and very prevalent reference to some sort of an important category of people. like a descender or something. crazy ik (2: Electric boogaloo)
WHAT!!!! (and like 4 billion other examples i couldnt bother to gather and sc sorry)
and like. sure sure lets not get too crazy we need to remember skirks usage of this same power as well thats a good point. i should remain skeptical of my own insanity thats very true. we all get a sticker for responsible behavior UwU
so she indeed turned the narwhal into a black hole there yes. She Did That. so maybe its just the power from beyond thing. its void power its quantum but genshin. the black hole/collapsing star stuff is all surtalogis power okay lets consider that for arguments sake. well i guess that means its just surtalogis brand of transcendent abyss power and not about black holes slash dead stars that may or may not be dead descenders. thats fine
Whew i guess thats it then we solved it guys. okay i can accept that. its abyss power because surtalogi things and childe and the narwhal displaying it is all because of surtalogis plots and teachings and powers. something like that
and even if that may be a bit anticlimactic of a conclusion for a narwhalpilled truther like myself (with a penchant towards Theres Some Descender Shit Going On With Ajax antics as well) at the very least its good that there isnt any datamined book series in which some particularly pygmy-esque individuals Strangely fitting of our current descriptions and knowledge of of dain + the sinners band together to merk some guy from beyond teyvat with special powers that may or may not be the irminsul-proofed historical account of a particular descenders death so nothing like THAT can throw a wrench into our very confirmed conclusion of surtalogis power and by extension childe and maybe even the narwhals black hole motifs just being basic abyss element power that has absolutely Nothing to do with any descenders or... dead stars? yeah its a good thing nothing like that exists .
OH SH----
#NO I CANT MAKE IT MAKE SENSE IT JUST DRIVES ME INSANE. THESE THOUGHTS. I DONT HAVE A GOOD POINT OR ANYTHING IM JUST#DYING OVER THERE THANKS. HOLDS HEAD IN HANDS#BLACK HOLES.... WHY IS IT BLACK HOLES... COLLAPSING DEAD STARS..............................#(also as u might notice. thanks 2 catwithbluehat for yt genshin cutscene compilation for da screenshots o7)#anyway#even if i dont actually happen to have any particular point or theory to offer here. i just find it inch resting how this motif repeats .#strange. odd even. certainly scrumptious#like . Curious. whatever may they be implying. and like ultimately i just think its soooo funny#whyever would a Particular 14 yo awaken a whale that Happens to be drawn to eating Stars Specifically. like what is it abt Him there huh.#hey wouldnt it be EVEN funnier if that purple guy inside the narwhal. with a LITERAL black hole in his chest. that also transforms into.#that eye of the maelstorm there . during the battle. and protects the core of the narwhal in its stomach#was ever called like. idk an ancient nemesis or maybe just a shadow of such nemesis too. in an early beta or sth. for a TCG summon mby#like even more strongly suggesting the dark shadow = narwhals prey = a dead star = a....dead descender even??? jkjk for last part. (unless)#but the first 3... like if it ate its nemesis and the nemesis is thusly that echoed shadow of a prey..... hmmm how Curious#why would a whale that chases stars ... chase that guy too enough to eat him ............#(this is a jkjk unless way of being like. what if the dudes ajax but a past incarnation hehe. what if theyre soulmates like that. tee hee.)#(what if a dead descender has been reincarnating all this time like that . wouldnt that be quirky . also they should kiss)#(ignore me im dying inside.)#anyway . for real tho . idk what the fuck any of this Actually means it just lives rent free.#like idek what im trying to say with any of this shit qskjwajkwdjJKWJKWDJKWDJKD#also the photo quality w the yt scs is kinda ass but thats on me lmao.#rambles#genshin#childeposting#narwhalposting
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brocedes as songs pt2
eventually by tame impala
i dont even need to spell it out for you
"if only there could be another way to do this
cause it feels like murder to put your heart through this
I know I always said that I could never hurt you
well this is the very very last time that I'm ever going to"
like this is literally Nico in 2016, coming to terms with his championship victory and the price he had to pay to get there. Cause there's no way that these two tore their over a decade long friendship apart and hurt each other the way they did without dying inside. And then he retired.
actually going feral
#I KNOW I ALWAYS SAID I COULD NEVER HURT YOU#im dying inside#literally at a wedding and thinking abt brocedes#brocedes#lewis hamilton#nico rosberg#f1#tame impala
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right if people's post ab reckless wont stop showing up on my tumblr, i will actually idk. THIS IS A SERIOUS THREAT GUYS
#im literally crying rn#reckless lauren roberts#STOP IT PLEASEEEEE#IM DYING INSIDE AND IVE ALREADY MANAGED TO READ ONE OTHER BOOK#AHUCIOEHEOWVHJJOVHFJRW
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Shit Post venting hour let's go:
Trans Bro/Trans Dirk has endometriosis (*enBROmetriosis, because people are shitty and don't get that guys have it, too), even AFTER getting a hysterectomy, because, unfortunately, sometimes our bodies are just transphobic like that. (True story, bro...) He doesn't get symptoms regularly post-op, but when they hit, they hit like a plane-wreck - it's a huge disaster for one, and it also becomes everyone else's business.
Trans Dave doesn't have endo, but still goes through a lot of pain relievers for normal cramps. He forgot to tell Bro they were out of medicine last time.
Cue Bro stuck hugging the toilet, sick from how much pain he's in as soon as he wakes up, and Dave doesn't hear him call out for healing.
As soon as Dave hears Bro talking about Advil, he immediately remembers his mistake and realizes why Bro's been extra volatile lately (PMS/PMDD/etc).
#i know it's cringe dude but im living it and i know theres nothing more cringe than not being able to breathe bc it hurts too much to move#or waking up from not sleeping all night only to vomit as soon as you get up bc it hurts too fucking much and you didnt get meds yet#endo is a special hell my body has made for me to punish me for being too trans#ditched the uterus so my body downloaded a trojan uterus to replace it except now its all over my insides...#...even tho im on medicine thats supposed to suppress endo growth#im having a whole mental breakdown over it and saw someone talkin shit on trans dirk so this is for them specifically (blocked)#fffffuuuuuckk these cramps holy shit im dying literally any pressure on my abdomen is too tight even just my sweater resting on it#homestuck#bro strider#dirk strider#bro#dirk#trans bro strider#trans dirk strider#trans dirk#trans bro#striders#endometriosis#trans man#hoooly fk im tryn not to die rn jfc i might need to puke again#emetophobia mention#endo#enbrometriosis#art#vent#ShitPost.exe#Cori.exe#Image.exe#Create.exe#i had to stop typing tags to go puke bc the pain is so bad lollllll
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this is hell
#anti taylor swift#have a student who wants to plah a taylor swift song and its stuck in my head#i didnt even know the song before last week when i first started teaching her#god...like im seriously not trying to be a hater but damn. its literally. 2 chords guys. okay 4. but two of those are just substitutes#of the other two with the same harmonic function of sundominant-tonic. god.#even she was like wow its literally just these two chords#and i was like yea :) <-dying inside. its so bad guys#and before anyone is like OOH WHYA RE YOU SHITTING ON THIS POOR WOMAN'S TASTES#YOUR HER TEACHER DEAL WITH IT. i do.#i do deal with it#but it takes a massive toll on me#literally just ranting on my personal tumblr. irl i know how tobehave professionally okay fear not
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Haven't been able to watch too much naruto recently. Been watching Maybe an episode a day ish. I just finished ep 419 tho and WHAT an episode to have ahead of me for grand number 420. Can't watch it rn tho bc I need to sleep and also I'm too tired to give it the full attention that I want to. Bc when I watch it, I will be embracing !!!!THE!!!! legendary Guy vs Madara fight in its FULL FORM!!!!!!
So exciting. God they're laying some major death flags lol, between the flashbacks stuff and the gate of death and well the saying he's gonna die 😂😂😂 I know he does survive it tho. But I'm also embracing this part with the Possibility of him dying. Bc that's what the others are reacting to too. And I wanna experience the full depth of emotion....
Excited for watching this next episode!!! It just cannot be right now.
#speculation nation#fanny watches naruto#some wild shit going on in general. naruto is still not up yet. he's been 'dying' for like almost 30 episodes now.#granted 20 of them were filler lol but still!!!#actually can i just say. genuinely fucking WILD what all Sakura's doing to try to keep him alive.#mouth to mouth is fairly normal (though the me that started reading fanfic in the first place for naruto/sakura went !!!!! at that)#but. the. literally cutting open the side of his chest so she can Reach Inside and pump his heart with her OWN HAND???#just IN HIS CHEST??? HER HAND??? AROUND HIS HEART????? and they DONT end up together?!?!?!?#like i mean obviously naruto & sasuke have a thing but like with kishimoto doing final heterosexual pairings#it's just wild to me that Naruto ends up with Hinata who he has BARELY any development with#instead of Sakura who is like. his bestie also she put her LITERAL HAND IN HIS CHEST TO PUMP HIS BLOOD WITH HER BARE HAND#im genuinely still kinda losing my mind at that. naruto show off the shits!!!!!!#also kind of funny tho. if i remember right she just cuts into. the side? of his chest? like. the ribcage area???#in which case to reach inside to his Heart she'd have to like. cut his ribs. entirely. and then dislodge them to reach inside.#which like theyve got weird ninja magic they can heal shit also naruto's an extra special case anyways.#but still. i have to wonder whether any of them have like. actual human anatomy hdkshfksh#considering how non fatal being stabbed in the chest is in this show. UNLESS it's for plot development. 🙄🙄🙄#but yeah if 12 year old me saw sakura literally grabbing naruto's heart in his chest to pump his blood. i wouldve lost my God Damn Mind.#im still kinda losing my mind. it's so fucking *intimate* it's like. Bonkers.#and naruto is ENTIRELY unaware!!!!! and i very much doubt she'll fill him in. alas.#anywyas i need to go to bed but. yes 👍 naruto 👍
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for the love of all things good and whumpy, PLEASE read this scene:
Im so happy with how it turned out, I'm still reeling-
#literally begging for readers#im dying inside#my hands are still shakign from writing that#i LOVE parker#please dont be intimidated that its a named scene#they just insisted on the names#its a standalone#no context required
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Saltburn spoilers!!!
I was literally just watching this movie and I made it through a whole hour and 20 minutes, the bathtub scene, the Oliver and Venetia scene, all of that didn’t make me as uncomfortable or give me more secondhand embarrassment than when Felix finds out Oliver has normal parents..
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